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Pirattitude!: So you Wanna Be a Pirate?: Here\'s How! by John Baur and Mark Summers is half Being a Pirate for Dummies and half Hitchhikers Guide to the Pirate Ship. The book is a guide to «Ol' Chumbucket» Baur and «Cap'n Slappy» Summers's creation, International Talk Like a Pirate Day, held every September 19. Still, the advice goes beyond talking like a pirate to all aspects of Pirattitude including: getting in touch with your inner pirate, dressing like a pirate, picking up girls (or guys) like a pirate, partying like a pirate and even attracting a parrot like a pirate (which involves standing naked in a tropical jungle reciting Shakespearean sonnets).

Sidebar blurbs throughout the book combine real historical tidbits and bits of genuine etymology of pirate sayings with a healthy dose of satire. For example, they give some good tidbits on that most famous of pirates, Edward Teach aka Blackbeard, dressed up with his «Turn ons» («Random violence, the stench of hell, rum!») and «Turn Offs» («Kittens, daises and pop music»). Another bit of sidebar wisdom notes that «filibuster» is another word for pirate (it's more technically a mercenary, but close enough)...always knew those Senators were up to no good.

As if all that weren't reason enough to buy it, the book reveals, on page 166, the location of the Treasure of the Sierra Madre thanks to a generous clue from noted pirate songster John Denver. But I'll probably beat you to it.

pirate,Talk Like a Pirate Day